LETTERS: July 14 Issue
Editor’s Note: We goofed up. In our last Drink Local column, a photo of Robert Trottman, the generous outgoing and informative “wine educator” at Ledger David, was misidentified as Rob Folin, who is a winemaker of Folin Vineyards. Our apologies. Both men are wonderful sources of wine information and we highly recommend both Ledger David and Folin Vineyard, even if we don’t always know who’s who.
Re.: The Day the Music Died (in Ashland): Ashland’s Losses of Music Venues is The Rest of the Region’s Gains
Looking forward to spending time at the Sound Lounge. NICE people and what a GEM that upstairs is at the Haul. Both within walkibg distance of my humble abode!!
– Janet West
Never thought that cannabis would work well with peanut butter, but that’s definitely a recipe I’m going to have to try because it looks so good! Thanks for sharing your tips and recipes!
Re.: Dear Ashland City Council, A Call For Deer Research
Nicely researched and written. However, I would like to point out that you forgot one major factor that contributes to deer overpopulation: lack of natural predators. You never once mentioned natural predators, such as wolves, that keep deer populations down. Cougars gladly eat deer, but humans have been good at keeping cougars well away from the town. Packs of coyotes generally prey on fawns. And we all know how ranchers like to kill things as their herds kill our open lands outside of town.
– Star Chad Star
Maybe this is crazy, but deer are an amazing FOOD source. Why can’t the city or county hire a team of “population control” experts who turn the city deer into a food source for families in need or even income for the city itself.
Hey Messenger: People seem to throw around the words “psychopath” and “sociopath” pretty freely. The only thing I’ve noticed is that people use “psychopath” when they are trying to be meaner. Is there a difference and if so, what is it?
Dear Anonymous: Clinicians do not officially use either terms. I double checked my copy of the DSM-5 to make sure, and they were not there. Both conditions just fall under the category of Antisocial Personality Disorder. Colloquially speaking, as far as I can tell, the phrase “hot-headed sociopath and cold-hearted psychopath” sums up what lay people mean when they throw around these words. It seems to me that more emotionally unpredictable types are labeled “sociopaths,” while the more ruthless and calculating are labeled as “psychopaths.” Pop-psychology writers Robert Hare and Paul Babiak insist that psychopathy is genetic, while sociopathy is somehow environmental. It is worth noting that although their resumes are impressive, they are not clinicians.
The bottom line is this: I do not think it is right for any non-clinician to use these words to label others, especially not as insults. It contributes to the societal taboos on mental illness and neuro-diversity alike, which keeps many people from getting the help they need. Just don’t do it. Call them an asshole instead.
Hey Messenger: Well I guess you could say my fiancé’s family is full of racists. My parents were from Mexico but my ancestry is mostly from Spain. I’m proud of my heritage. I don’t think my fiancé cares about race either way, and because of his family background, he doesn’t like talking about it either. I think he tries to “play both sides” maybe. Which means he doesn’t defend me when we are around his family and they make racist comments. He just says I shouldn’t care what they think. What should I do? Also, is this a reason to not marry someone?
Dear M., Is what a reason not to marry someone? The person’s racist family, or the person not defending you? This is where I might differ from many people: I think the second one is worse in the context of a relationship. Do not get me wrong: racists are completely useless and disgusting. However, he has a point when he says you should not care what they think. Your fiancé not standing up for you is worse because he owes you something very real as your partner- something that maybe no one else on Earth owes you. He should care what YOU think, and you are clearly unhappy. Here is the revealing question: would he defend you if someone insulted you on some other grounds, not having to do with race? If the answer is yes, as I suspect it is, then something fishy is going on. This could mean that he may actually be a racist himself. If the answer is no, then he might just be a coward across the board. Figure out the answer to this, and then decide if it is deal-breaker for you.